Perfection...?

Ten small parts. Two hours. That's how long I spent last night putting this signal in place. Am I satisfied? Probably. Could it be better? Definitely.

I've been working on this layout for about 6 weeks now, and it's taking shape nicely. I've made significant progress with the big picture and am starting to work on the small details, such as this light-only signal (it won't actually stop trains, it is only there for decoration/effect). So I spent 2 hours on it last night getting it as right as I possibly could. With all things Lego, I'm something of a perfectionist, getting it to look as "right" as possible.

But that perfectionism comes at a price; sometimes it means rebuilding something several times, sometimes it means ordering parts from Lego re-sellers worldwide. www.bricklink.com is a wonderful resource if you haven't yet found it. Building Lego is largely a solitary thing, I can immerse myself in it for hours, so perfectionism only impacts on me. But elsewhere?

"The world" is constantly telling us to improve; to upgrade our phone, get better exam results, Continuing Professional Development, wear this, look like that etc etc. I'm not against improvement, but we must be aware of the underlying message that can be sent out - "You're not good enough as you are without the perfect______"; insert grades/phone/trainers/qualification as you see fit.

I don't have a degree.

I did my Leaving Cert in Ireland twice before I left school.

I bought my first iPod after I turned 40.

I get it wrong, I sin, regularly. I'm not cool. I'm not perfect. And never will be.

But I don't stop striving towards perfection. As a person, as a Lego builder, as a Christian, I always want to do better, but we must never lose sight of the fact that we are who we are, not what we achieve. I believe I'm made in the image of God, and that's enough for me. Knowing God, through Jesus, the author and perfecter of my faith, spurs me on to give more, serve more, love more, play more, work more, build more, give Him my best. My best is what he demands of me, because I can achieve my best. I cannot achieve perfection. God does not set us up to fail.

The signal I built last night is finally the best I could achieve. I would say there's room for improvement, but with the parts available to me last night, I'm not sure what that could be. I'll keep on learning, trying new things, to do better, but I learned long ago not to get hung up on perfection and simply give my best.

Vision Evolving

Sometimes when you start something you don't know exactly what's going to happen - where a journey will take you or in this case, what a station might look like! I know when I'm working through with God "what next?", the final destination is rarely crystal clear, and the path certainly isn't! The journey is all part of the adventure.

 When I set out building this layout, I knew I wanted a station that people could easily see into, which meant lots of clear panels, and one that if it was in "the real world" would be light and airy, not claustrophobic and dank, think Birmingham New Street if you've had the pleasure...

I also had in mind enclosed platforms, at least part way along, and once the next bricklink.com or Lego.com Pick-a-brick order arrives, the large transparent wall on the right will be completed to give an enclosed, box shape station with cover over the platforms. Access to the island platforms is via elevator, with one at each end and a connecting elevator/subway combination from the subway. They may or may not get motorized in due course!

 During the build, things evolved and various bits were taken apart and rebuilt, and as it stands I'm reasonably happy with how it will look when finished. There is still a way to go, but just like real life, the journey is as much part of the adventure as the destination. While I'm waiting for the parts to arrive for the wall, I'll be detailing the ground floor inside and starting on the final section this weekend. We'll see where it goes and what it looks like!

Laying Down and Picking Up

Just over a year ago life changed, dramatically. Over a few short months I realised my marriage had reached the point of collapse, and found myself moving from a 3-bed semi with a permanent Lego space to a cosy 2 bed apartment, living on my own and establishing a new living pattern, space and way of being. Emotionally, I was all over the place, and the last thing I wanted to do was tinker with Lego when all I could see was what I'd lost; space to build and be creative, a relationship that my life was built around, and the security I thought I had in those things.

Since then, I've seen myself being rebuilt. I'm a Christian, I've spent 20 years leading Christian youth groups and heard many, many stories of healing. Now I've lived, and am living, through that healing and restoring, they aren't just stories of healing, I have a different perspective. There's no "fairytale ending", the marriage relationship is over, but I am in a better place.

I've learned to appreciate the things we take for granted: I have a roof over my head, a job that pays the rent and puts food on the table and enables me to enjoy my hobbies. I've shifted my focus. Lego used to be a huge part of who I am (and still is), but I don't want it to be the be-all-and-end-all that at times it became. I spent a year without touching the little bricks with any interest. I did the soul searching. I laid it all out before God, warts and all, and let go of everything I held dear. I used to think I could take Jesus teaching on "give everything up and follow me" seriously, that if called to do it, I could, wherever that may lead. Now, having let go of Lego for a year, the itch is back and I'm scratching, but I am willing to let go of it again if that's what God calls me to do.

My attitude had changed. Friends children call me "Lego Andy", which is cute, and separates me from their Dad Andy, but I want to be known for more than that. I want to use my Lego to point towards God. He's re-built me, he's given me the ability to build and create, I want Him to take the glory. We sing "Jesus, be the centre", but how often do we let our interests/hobbies/habits get in the way? I know I have done.

I laid down the bricks for a year, willing to not take them up again if part of the future for me is in a place where it's not practical to have it all with me. I don't know, by the way, what that future holds or where it is, but while I can, I'm enjoying building, aware of the talent God has blessed me with.

I don't know what this layout will look like when it's "finished", I don't know what I'll be like in 2 years, 10 years, 20 years, or where I'll be living. But I do know that while I might still be known as Lego Andy, I also want to be known as someone who, among other things, builds Lego, builds the part of the Kingdom of God I'm living in and is willing to change as the vision evolves.

Destruction and Completion

 Well, the second section is finished, for the second time.... I tried to move it yesterday to site it beside the other section for a photo and it didn't like the angle it needed to be tipped at. Thankfully I have custom made boxes on the way which will help with that!

This is the first of two middle sections, and includes half the length of the platforms of the feature station that will be on the next section and half of the elevated track section on what will be the back of the layout when viewed.

All the wiring is contained within the unit, 12v fans will know that one of the joys of that now vintage system is that it can be all operated remotely, so the points and signals all have switches, which are built into the viaduct carrying the upper level of track. You can just see them sticking out on this view.

The platforms have two 12v signals that start/stop trains, again wired and operated from the control panel, and also include 4 light bricks that light up the lower platforms.

The vision for the layout is evolving, I have a picture in my head now of what the station will look like, but there are many steps to get there, and some need to be re-traced when disaster strikes. But Lego is Lego, designed to be re-built. Life chucks all sorts at us, we're not always strong enough to re-build ourselves but as a Christian I'm willing to let God play a part in that re-building.

Finished, But Not Yet.

Ok, so the fist section of the new layout is finished. Ish. 

After numerous tweaks and adjustments, I'm happy with what I've got. I've managed to bury a 9v controller in the back left of the section, you can just about make it out, it's the black "blob" in that corner above. It's completely out of sight in the second pic. 

Building involved making sure that on both levels there weren't going to be any collisions between trains and bits of greenery, the proof will eventually be in the running of trains for the first time but that's a way down the track. Currently, the back of the section is open so I can get a hand in to remove derailed trains etc, and for the curious, my estimate is that there are about 3,500 green bricks in there....

I've started work on the next section, making sure that it will line up with this, and now the real challenges start, as the wiring, lighting, signalling and points are appearing. I'll add updates occasionally as it progresses, and this first section will only really be "finished" when the bridge that is key to carrying the track is ready to go on the next section and a little bit can be added to the edges of this one. But that's another journey!

9 hours of building... For what?

I'd forgotten how tiring 9 hours of building could be! But boy did I enjoy the day yesterday, taking the fist quarter of the layout, the first section, from simple baseplates to a nicely progressed set of tunnels and hillside.

You can see the three loops of track, which will enable three trains to run at the same time, and the part completed base for what will  be the upper level of track, which is swallowing a vast number of grey plates.... Bricklink will do well out of me methinks later in the build! The rolling stock that's in shot is there so I can check clearances etc as I build. Some locos etc, for example, my Duchess of Sutherland, overhang the corners much more than others, and with numerous pillars etc to hold up the top level, it's crucial to check that everything that will run through the tunnels etc won't crash into them. Sadly, the Duchess overhangs so much she'll only be running on the much more visible top level. Oh well...   :-) 

Space is a significant limiting factor in this layout (as of course, is budget...), and to get 3 loops on each level meant I had to bring them quite close to the edge of the baseplates. That in turn means there isn't a huge amount of space for landscape etc, which means that the hills the tunnels run through will have the "chopped off" look to them at the edge of the layout. It also limits the scope for detailed work around the mouths of tunnels, which are often sloped rather than flat-fronted as I've built them. Of course, most tunnels on the real railway networks don't have another track doing directly above them either!

That said, realism isn't top of my list of priorities for the layout. Getting something up and running after a year without, and doing some serious building is. Ultimately, once this layout is finished*, it won't run very often, just on special occasions when I can take it to a venue big enough to set it up, such as school fairs and the like. So why am I building it? 

I believe God has given each of us the ability to be creative, and for me one of those expressions of creativity is through lots of little bricks. I love the act of building, of creating something that is just an image in my head. I've no real idea what the finished thing will look like, it will evolve. But ultimately, I want to share this with other people, let them enjoy what I've created. In my head, it works. In my head, it will get out the door of my flat in one piece. In practice, there'll be challenges, broken sections (that can be repaired), and a vision that seems at times beyond what I think I can achieve. 

But isn't that what God asks us to do? Catch hold of a vision, a mission, and go for it? Accepting that there will be difficulties, and at times it will seem impossible for us to achieve. And for us on our own, it may well be impossible. I know I'll need help to get these sections out the door. But where something seems impossible, faith steps in. Grasp the vision, go for it, and walk in faith. 

* Finished? There will always be room for improvement, a tweak here, a touch there. I'm not convinced a layout is ever finished, it just reaches a point where I'm happy for other people to see it while I work on it. 

The Baseboards are Ready (almost)

I must resist the temptation to start building tomorrow! I've spent today building the base boards that the whole layout will sit on, and the temptation is to get the bricks out and get cracking, but I need to be patient and wait. I could crack on, but that would make it more difficult to paint the rails around the boards.

Yes, there's a gap in the middle of each board! Each one is designed to take 15 Lego 32x32 baseplates, the standard size for road plates etc, which comes out at 765 mm x 1274 mm, and B&Q's biggest bit of chipboard is 1220 mm deep... So my limited carpentry skills stretched them a bit with the gap, which will be covered by the baseplates anyway. The rail on 3 sides of this board are to keep everything in place when I'm transporting the sections.

The four baseboards are currently sitting on the table in the lounge, the top one here shows the road plan for one end of the layout.

I've got the day off on Tuesday, the forecast isn't great, so I'm hoping to get on with the proper building then, once I've painted the rails and done a bit of sanding tomorrow.